Nutshell Ramble/Rant

Clichéd film with clichéd nonsense and cliched characters. The movie can go throw itself off that bridge it, so gratuitously, shows off, if it thinks its breaking any new ground by calling itself the first ever Bollywood rom-com.

OVERALL SCORE – 1.25/5

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Full Ramble/Rant

Befikre is a 2016 “rom-com” directed by Aditya Chopra, written by Aditya Chopra and Sharat Katariya and stars Ranveer Singh and Vaani Kapoor. The film allegedly attempts at being the first ever romantic comedy in the Hindi film industry’s history.

This movie can go to hell. It can go to hell and die. Its a source of amusement and amazement to anyone that a massive studio with so much history, Yash Raj Films, can make dud after dud so easily. It baffles the mind that the head-honcho there cannot learn from some very blatant mistakes. Aditya Chopra supposedly has all the goodwill in the world because he made Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge and even though I, personally, do not think the film is all that great, I do agree with its cultural significance and accept the status it holds in Bollywood history. Befikre however is not that film.

Befikre (Carefree) is clearly how the filmmakers felt while making this film. They seriously look like they did not give a single f**k. A 10% baked story, or lack thereof, combined with Paris as the setting does not save the film. Ranveer Singh and Vaani Kapoor might be one the most cookie cutter leads anyone may have seen on film. They have no discernible personality or character apart from the fact that he is a horn dog and she takes her shirt off a lot. The two character traits mentioned above are egregious to the point of self parody. But they do not cross the parody barrier because the film does not realize its trash.

The film does not give the audience a single reason to care about it or its characters. Neither of  them is likable nor is there a good story for them to chew on. The film also has two of the worst character arcs in Bollywood history. Say goodbye to progressive character growth and say hello to saying your motivations out loud because the script demands you to do so. The direction is as inept as it can get. There is no creativity to be found. Paris-porn can only take the film so far. One can shoot Paris like a sexy girl who adds nothing to the film, just like the film shoots its female lead, all they want but that makes your film a tourism advert more than a storytelling medium.

Lastly let’s have a few words about the film’s script. I have a theory that this script started as a story for a porno but was changed at the very last second to fit a mainstream Bollywood venture. This is an abysmal attempt at writing romance or comedy. Both those elements fall flat at almost every turn. There is no heart in the story. There are no romantic scenes to be had. Just making your lead characters do stupid dares to show they are carefree and awesome souls means jack and shit when they do not share any chemistry apart from we are sexy, we should bang.

I may have said this before, but filmmaking for story beats than filmmaking for characters completely undercuts any meassage the film is trying to convey.  I like hot people falling in love at exotic locations just as much as the next person but make me believe they are in love. Make me believe this is plausible. Make me believe the characters are growing and changing. Make me believe they have something more to offer than just being horny idiots. Something, anything, god damn it. As a person who has lived overseas and understands Visa regulations, Ranveer Singh’s character should have been deported 10 different times.

This rant is not to say that no person in the audience will enjoy the film playing on-screen. Far from it. I heard a whole lot of howling laughter a good bunch of times. But a person who has ever seen more than 5 romance films before will rip this film to shreds 5 minutes after its pathetic opening credit sequence. Just as an add-on, the more Bollywood cannibalizes it older, better, films, the more they show their current product is going nowhere but the crap chute. Last but not least, gay jokes are funny when there is a joke involved, gay is not the joke.

I do have a lot more to say but I do not think this film deserves any more of my writing time because I storngly believe that the time I took to write this random blog post is exactly the same as the time that was taken to write this script.

OVERALL SCORE – 1.25/5

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